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Dog News A puppy's guide to training humans.


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Grizzle Border Terrier Puppy


My Training Schedule

A puppy's guide to training humans

Today's training went very well. I was pleased with the progression the humans were making. And do you know what, they have weaknesses? I now know the strong and weak humans. By playing on this, I get extra nibbles. I was incredibly pleased about how I got lots of extra treats by acting very dumb. He he he! How clever is that?

Now, let me tell you how to be a stubborn puppy. Be yourself, have fun, and enjoy acting dumb to gain extra rewards and treats. My humans are exceedingly kind, and they never ever get angry with me. I pretend to be unbelievably soft and cuddly, and they love it! Do not tell them I am playing with their weaknesses.

They have been teaching me the commands to sit, fetch, down, and how to walk sensibly with a lead.

Here is my secret that I am sharing with all my puppy friends. It is about how to succeed and to be a proud puppy for their owners.

First, only respond to explicit commands. As they say in the military when on operations, doing their sneaky beaky things, keep it simple and straightforward. With a smart KISS you cannot go wrong!

I have been remarkably successful in exploiting the ambiguities of the humans' poor use of language. You do not know how incomprehensible and confusing they make their language. They should have studied linguistic philosophy or learnt the basics of management theory such as in command and coordination. What happened to their education? Puppies must put up with all this confusion. My advice is not only to keep the human language clear, explicit, and simple but even more importantly, use it to breakdown tasks or activities into small, simple steps or stages.

Wise puppies know that backward chaining and behaviour modification work.

In puppy history, the Russian scientist, Pavlov, was hijacked by our distant doggy relations, to create a new psychology of learning. Check it out. It is not a perspective the I subscribe to myself. Although useful, I prefer cognitive psychology.

Enough of this anyway. I am certain that my humans do not understand this, but I will support their growth and development.

On another subject, have you seen those dog trainers On YouTube or read books buy them? How arrogant! They think they know everything.

Until my next episode, take care.

Isla, the ten-week-old, Border Terrier puppy from Stirlingshire.


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